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For the first time probably ever, a certain member of the our monthly club has introduced an all-new BOTM. We honestly can't believe it. IT'S A FESTIVUS MIRACLE. In other, far less exciting December BOTM news, there's duck, buffalo sauce, a misnamed Hawaiian burger and some sandwich.  

Bobby's Burger Palace

Holy shit. We had to do a double take when we saw Bobby's Burger Palace's December BOTM. For the first time – God, we can't even remember...maybe EVER?? – Mr. Food Network has created an all-new, never-before-seen burger of the month. This is some earth-shattering shit right here. Bobby's Christmas Burger hits the scene with the red, green and white, topping a patty with red chile sauce, green chile salsa and Monterey Jack. Hot damn, Christmas has come early. Now, Flay, about that D.C.-themed burger... 2121 K Street, NW | DC | bobbysburgerpalace.com  

Burger Tap & Shake

Our Christmas dinners usually revolve around turkeys and hams though that one time the oven gave out, we did grab a 50-piece order of wings from Hooters (yeah, they're open on Christmas Day). We've never gone the way of "A Christmas Story" but this year BTS is giving us the chance with their Christmas Duck BOTM. The Foggy Bottom and Tenleytown burger slingers top a duck patty with Swiss cheese, Ruby Red sauerkraut and orange marmalade aioli, letting us chow down just like the Ralphie, the Old Man and the rest of the Parkers. Bumpuses be damned. 2200 Pennsylvania Ave NW | 4445 Wisconsin Ave NW | DC | burgertapandshake.com   

BGR The Burger Joint

Back after less than a year (it was a BOTM in January) is BGR's Buffalo Bacon Bleu. A beef patty dipped in Frank’s Red Hot Sauce, blue cheese dressing, a couple of celery sticks and some bacon, it's like eating wings. But not really. [Burger Days Review, Dec 2013] 11 Locations in D.C., Maryland and Virginia | bgrtheburgerjoint.com  

Dogwood Tavern

Wow. Dogwood Tavern missed a huge opportunity here with the naming of its December BOTM. The Hawaiian-themed burger has the standard components: grilled pineapple, teriyaki sauce, Swiss and then adds bacon and grilled red onions, too. But then they name it The Big Kahuna?!? It's a Hawaiian burger at Christmas! Come on! The Mele Kalikimaka Burger! HELLO??? 132 West Broad Street | Falls Church | dogwoodtavern.com   

Social Burger

Blame the people for this one. For December, Vienna's Social Burger let its customers vote on the final BOTM of the year. Twelve previous burger specials were on the ballot, and eleven of them were actual burgers. So, what did the masses, in their infinite wisdom, choose? The only goddamn sandwich of the group: the Steak and Cheese. Sirloin, provolone, roasted green pepper mayo. Bah humbug. 350 Maple Avenue West | Vienna| mysocialburger.com   (We're always on the lookout for BOTMs. If you know of another D.C.-area joint that hooks up a monthly special burger, email us and let us know.)